sorry its been so long, im really not good at this blogging thing! im trying tho! anyways, i measured myself today and ive lost 5.25 inches since the last time i measured!! im SO SO SO PUMPED!! i go to JC tomorrow to weigh in so wish me luck!! lol, but over the past week-two weeks, ive been given a peace about this whole idea of dieting/losing weight--. just about how i AM making the effort and i AM doing my best, and i KNOW the weight will come off, its all a matter of time....Last night i was reading in my devo book (which i desperately need to do more of) and it was saying that it is so hard for those people who HATE themselves to LOVE others. How is it possible to LOVE ANYONE when you have so much hate for yourself??? God has called us to love our enemies, love those who do not yet know HIM, and it cannot be done, if our every thought and way of thinking is influenced by our own hate for ourselves..... i never realized it, but thats EXACTLY what i have been going through....I HATED looking at myself in the mirror, or in pictures, or just being out in public IN GENERAL, because i hated myself so much and EMBARRASSED of how i looked.....( my weight being the KEY here).... but i feel God has freed me from that burden and this HUGE weight has been LIFTED off of me, and i have a THOUSAND TIMES more faith in myself, in GOD, and in the FACT that i WILL lose this weight,.... I feel that there has been this TREMENDOUS choke-hold the devil has had on me with suffering from the constant judging of myself-- in how i look, what i wear, where i wear it, and who will see me....... i was never able to see God through MY OWN SELF DISCRIMINATIONS.......
i am proud to say that the devil HAS NO HOLD ON ME!!! lol, can i get an AMEN!! lol, but last night i ALSO went through my WHOLE closet, and tried basically EVERYTHING on to see what fit, what was getting looser, what was fitting a little better, what sizes i was getting into.....and it just gave me such a GREAT excitement!! knowing that i am SEEING results and that it IS happening is SUCH an encouragement!! i KNOW you know what im talking about!!! there are some pairs of pants that i wont be able to wear anymore of!!
and you've done SUCH AN AAAAMAZING JOB!! you have DEFINITELY been an inspiration to me throughout this obstacle and througout the ENTIRE TIME ive known you!! you've always been there, and i am MORE THAN BLESSED that God would choose ME to be one of your friends!!!!!! I LOOOOOVE YOU!!!
have you gotten to go with your mom to go shopping yet????? we'll DEFINITELY have to hit the shops when you're here!!
my short term goal (before going back to school) is to be a comfortable size 12, which i KNOW is possible because some of my 14's are getting looser!! Ive got some new CUTE 12 pants that I REALLY want to wear to school!! and ALLLL of my old stuff that ive held on to since i was at SNU! hahaha....
but please continue to pray for me and i will, you!!! keep up the AMAZING work!! I LOVE YOU SOOOO MUCH!! no words can express!!! ;)
Monday, July 30, 2007
Monday, July 9, 2007
well helllloooo!!
hey hey!
After having an AMAZING week at your house and meeting your AMAZING boyfriend, i was greatly inspired to continue on this weight loss battle to look AMAZING before school starts up again!! Seeing you and how much weight you've lost and your dedication is what i REALLY needed to know that it IS possible!! so i printed off these little sayings of like "imagine yourself in a bathing suit, and not feeling that you shouldn't be in a bathing suit" or imagine yourself in your old jeans before you gained all the weight.....i think it really helps!! ive been having to think about it a couple of times a day just to get through, but i think its working so far!! ive been trying to cut back in my calories and watch my portion sizes and not eat late at night, and making sure to get my exercise in at least 5 times a week! im not really focusing on lifting or anything right now, im just wanting to focus on getting the weight off, on my eating habits, and then tone up later during school, when i have better access to a good gym....
so i think i can feel the weight coming off! its hard to really notice it in my clothes just yet, but i think im doing better! pray for me and for strength to fight this battle and WIN! im praying for you and everything you are facing at your new job as well as for you and jef! i LOVE YOUUUUUU!!! talk to you sooon!!
After having an AMAZING week at your house and meeting your AMAZING boyfriend, i was greatly inspired to continue on this weight loss battle to look AMAZING before school starts up again!! Seeing you and how much weight you've lost and your dedication is what i REALLY needed to know that it IS possible!! so i printed off these little sayings of like "imagine yourself in a bathing suit, and not feeling that you shouldn't be in a bathing suit" or imagine yourself in your old jeans before you gained all the weight.....i think it really helps!! ive been having to think about it a couple of times a day just to get through, but i think its working so far!! ive been trying to cut back in my calories and watch my portion sizes and not eat late at night, and making sure to get my exercise in at least 5 times a week! im not really focusing on lifting or anything right now, im just wanting to focus on getting the weight off, on my eating habits, and then tone up later during school, when i have better access to a good gym....
so i think i can feel the weight coming off! its hard to really notice it in my clothes just yet, but i think im doing better! pray for me and for strength to fight this battle and WIN! im praying for you and everything you are facing at your new job as well as for you and jef! i LOVE YOUUUUUU!!! talk to you sooon!!
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